At work, most of us spend more than 75% of our time communicating with others. With so much time spent in communicating it is no wonder that the root of many problems in the workplace is poor communication.

Effective communication is a vital part of the success of the individual, and organisations, whether it is a communication on the interpersonal, inter-group, internal or external levels.

Successful communicators create successful organisations.

There are many reasons for working on your communication skills and the impact can be far reaching.

Consider the benefits to your business and personal life if you could be a more effective communicator in these areas:

• With your spouse and children
• Being more assertive
• In conversation
• Develop emotional maturity
• Public speaking
• Relationships with other cultures
• Written communication
• Business letters
• Business ethics
• Workplace relations
• Conflict resolutions
• Crisis management
• Customer relations
• Creative thinking
• Meetings and appointments
• Job hunting
• Management strategies
• Marketing efforts
• Negotiating skills
• Networking
• Presentations
• Telephone marketing

Your communication skills are a part of how others will judge you. If you improve your skills as a communicator you will increase the likelihood that others will improve the way they treat you and regard you.

Read the statements below. Imagine that your boss has said each of these statements to you:

• I have an issue regarding your performance
• There is a problem regarding your performance
• I have some feedback regarding your performance
• We need to talk about your performance

How did you react to each of the statements? Did you react differently to each of them? Did each statement raise a different emotion? Did you want to respond to each of them in a different manner?

Now consider how different people you know could react differently to each of these very similar statements.

The choice of the first 4 words in each statement has significant impact on the success of the communication. These words are so powerful that they will drive perceptions about how much the communicator cares about the other person.

The perceptions and reactions to all four statements will vary from one individual to the next, depending on their background and experiences. The scary thing is you will never know just what the thing was that triggered someone’s reaction to your communication.

They may not know either. But the real thing is – they will have a reaction and once the reaction occurs it is very difficult to undo or change that initial reaction.

So a better, more effective, happier way is to get the communication right in the first place.

Understand here and now that for any communication to work you must take 100% responsibility for that communication. This does not mean that you have to force the other person to listen to you, and they have to understand and accept what you are saying.

It means that it is up to you to make sure all the criteria for a good communication are met before you start to speak

Reasons Why We Don’t Always Communicate Effectively

So why don’t we all have great communications all the time? It’s only words, and we all know lots of words. What holds us back?

Good communication skills begin with good manners – respect for the other person and respect for yourself. You show respect for the other person by listening fully and showing that you understand what that person means. You respect yourself when you put forward your own thoughts and comments without aggression.

To complete a good communication each person must give and receive. A bad communication is often governed by bad habits which will interfere with the direction and intention of the communicating parties. Anything that blocks the meaning of a communication is a barrier.

Some of these barriers are:

• judging
• giving solutions
• interrupting
• Ignorance
• not listening fully
• not paying full attention
• too busy
• bad timing
• arrogance
• social conditions
• ignoring the other person’s issues
• avoiding the other person’s concerns
• internal values & belief systems
• bad manners
• laziness
• reaction rather than deliberation
• limiting perspectives
• pre-conceived ideas
• not thinking before speaking
• careless use of words
• not realising how important words really are
  
• not taking responsibility for the communication
• believing communication is a 50-50 deal
• communication skills

Bad habits in conversations

Here are some bad habits in conversations which are guaranteed to prevent effective communication. They all block the meaning of what is really intended and create a response in the other person that is negative.

(By the way, if it is your intention to be negative and shut down the communication you are having with the other person, then here are some fine examples).

Criticising: – You know, it’s all your own fault

Insulting: – If you weren’t so stupid it wouldn’t have happened

Judging: – Well, that will never work

Using comments like these in a communication with another person shows that you are judging them, and imposes your point of view over theirs. The other person will feel offended and will react in a defensive manner.

Moralising: – You know you have to apologise for that, don’t you.

Ordering: – Do it now!

Threatening: – Do it now, or else.

Inappropriate & excessive questioning: – What happened? Who saw you? Is it your fault?

These comments are going to prevent effective communication because they are authoritative, controlling and judgmental. These comments are attempting to dictate how the other person should deal with the situation at hand.

Regardless of whether your intention was to be caring or to just get the job done, the result will be poor. You will not be able to communicate well when using these sort of comments as the other person will get their back up at being treated as if they cannot manage their own problems, and resentment will grow.

Deflecting: – That’s nothing. You should hear what happened to me.

Logics: – Well, if you go out on your own at night you can expect to get mugged.

Superior Smugness: – You’re young, you’ll get over it.

These comments all avoid and brush off the other person’s concerns. They keep you emotionally distant from the other person. These comments work to make you feel more comfortable; they are of no comfort at all to the other person and will always be a barrier to good communication.

Another interesting perception that leads to ineffective communication is the belief that ‘This is as good as it gets.’ We have learned to accept poor communication as being acceptable, it’s ok that things go pear shaped because that’s what communication is – really hard and this is the best I can do.  Very few people have experienced excellent communication so we don’t know how good it can get. We already think we have it as good as it can get. Because it is a common thing – talking, speaking and communicating – we think that we all know how to communicate well.

The scenarios detailed above do not always result in a negative communication, but they are high risk responses and do not go along the safest path. They are responses people use when they are under stress or just don’t stop to think about what is the best way to communicate in the current situation.

These poor communications will block the feelings of the other person and they will be less inclined to communicate in an open, honest and constructive manner. Ineffective communication will not benefit the individuals involved nor their abilities to solve problems and resolve issues.

People tend to use these responses most of the time. No wonder that there are so many communication problems, misunderstandings and conflicts that arise out of nowhere.

Understand right now that if you have ever experienced any of the above situations, spoken those phrases, or had them spoken to you – then you have experienced ineffective communication.

The good news is that is it not hard to be a great communicator. You just need to use the right tools……

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How can you tell the truth about a situation without fearing rejection, or disagree with someone without causing offence?  We tell ourselves that these conversations are difficult because we don’t want to upset the other person.  In fact, the slightly sick feeling we get is less to do with them and more to do with our internal dialogue about what we think could happen. 

Our basic nature is to avoid potential unpleasantness.   Tough conversations in high-stakes situations can often put us into a “fight or flight” state where we’re likely to turn to silence or violence — to withdraw and avoid the conflict or lash out in a hostile way to defend ourselves. Neither way is healthy, and almost always makes the problem worse.

This is completely natural and part of the human experience!

If you have experienced this, then you can use your experience to create an effective approach to having the actual conversation.  It involves all aspects of you – your head, your heart and some gusty courage..

Creativity

People often times do not have a thought-out strategy or plan.  In previous blogs, I have provided you with some useful steps to help you plan an effective approach and to manage your emotions so that they do not get the best of you. 

But even the best plans, strategy or practical steps can be useless if our emotions take over.

As human beings, we all are capable of being rational and logical.  We all experience emotions.  And we all have experienced times when we have gotten defensive, wanted to stand our ground or get away and feel safe.

We need to learn how to use ALL aspects of our human nature, and bring them together so that these aspects work together.  If not, one or more will dominate and one or more will be excluded.  This happens, for example, when our negative emotions are running so high we cannot ‘think straight’, and we forget to follow our wonderful strategy!

Another example is when we have the plan, mapped out our steps, have our emotions in check and we’re calm and focused, but then we just don’t have the courage to say what we really want to say!  We are too scared!

Let’s see how we can put all this together. 

With the worksheet for the Alive & Kicking 7 steps to challenging conversations sit down and complete each step, from #1 up to #5.  Use your head to find creative ways to think about the questions posed in each step.  What else can you think of?  And what else?

Your head is capable of finding solutions if you allow yourself to be curious, let yourself act as if you can find a workable solution, remove your limiting thoughts while you work through the 5 steps.

Compassion

I have emphasised the need to view the situation – and the other person – from a neutral perspective.  That is, to check your emotions so that they do not take over your ability to be rational and logical.  I also mentioned the need to ensure you are wearing the appropriate ‘hat’ for the conversation.

All this is the domain of your head – use it to its full capacity for creativity and rational thought.

Now let’s get in to the actual conversation – this is what you really want, right?

Courage

One of the reasons we have a visceral reaction is our body’s self-protective mechanism.  This is our autonomic nervous system (ANS) at work, and when we want to take flight or stand our ground and fight our sympathetic branch of the ANS takes over automatically.  Our body’s ability to sense danger and mobilise us in to action is physically located in our gastrointestinal tract – more specifically, in our gut.

Have you ever heard the term ‘gutsy courage’? Or described someone as having ‘guts’ to take action?  What these phrases refer to is the neurological wiring of our gut, where there are up to 500 million neurons that communicate up the vagus nerve to the head, conveying important information like “danger! Need to take action!”

Flight or Fight is the domain of the GUT

When a difficult situation arises and we feel the urge to run (or fight), we can work with the signal we feel and get the gut to check in with the head and review the plan.  This is an example of aligning our head with our gut. Put in other terms, this is a way to check our initial nervous response received from the ANS with the facts of the situation – there is a logical, rational way to approach this situation.

When we check the facts, the nerves can settle, and the gut can then choose a different course of action.

When we check back in with the gut, after reaffirming we have a good plan and strategy, the gut can now find reason to have courage to move forward and face the conversation with confidence. 

We have a plan and can now access courage, because our fears have been allayed with our strategy.

The Ripple Effect – the role of the HEART

The vagus nerve runs right next to the heart, the seat of all our emotions.  It is also where we access what is truly important to us, what we value most in our lives.  It is not the head that tells us how we feel about someone, it is our heart.

If we really want to be successful in having difficult conversations, we need to involve the heart.  This is as simple as considering why it is important to us to have the conversation.  Why is it truly important to you to have this conversation with the other person?

To activate our courage, we simply need to be compassionate.  Compassion is activated within us when we extend our emotions to others, and when we act upon those feelings.  This is the heart and the gut working together.

It may seem easier in the short term to avoid bringing up a difficult issue or highlighting a problem with performance, but the long-term consequences are tremendous.    Avoidance can lead to full on disconnection and breakdown of trust.

And guess where trust exists in you?

You got it – the heart!  Without trust, we cannot access emotions with and for other people.  When we disconnect from our heart, then our head and gut take over.

If you want to be truly effective and find workable solutions, you must use your head – and your heart – AND your gut, together. 

Step 6

As you go through the worksheet, ensure your heart is at peace when you plan to have the actual conversation.  Set aside the thoughts your head is sharing, and take a breath to calm the butterflies in your belly.  And allow yourself to feel compassion in your heart. 

Then extend this compassion to the other person – you do not have to love this other person, but if you allow yourself to feel positive emotions toward them, you will be able to resolve just about anything with them.

When you feel a connection to the other person (heart), then get curious (head).  Ask yourself what don’t you know about their perspective, their point of view, how they see the situation.  Allow yourself to really wonder what is really important to them in this situation, as you still feel compassion in your heart.  When you identify the truly important stuff, your courage will surface.  You will not be able to NOT have the conversation now!

Try this, and see where your conversation takes you.

Step 7

The final step in having confidence and success with difficult situations is to review what you did.  What can you pat yourself on the back for?  What did you do really well?  What efforts did you make of which you are very proud?

What would you do the same? And what would you do differently?

Reflect on the strategy you have now developed to deal with what you once considered to be difficult.  These sorts of conversations may never be easy, but they do not have to cause stress and frustration.  With the 7 steps to challenging conversations you now have a great way to manage challenging human interactions with more confidence.

Time and Effort

Are you going to stumble and make mistakes now and then?  Yessiree!  You sure are!  And it is through the mistakes we make as we are applying the skills we learned that we get to be able to use these skills smoothly, unconsciously, and arrive at the desired destination.

We would love to hear your success stories and answer your questions on this topic.  Please contact us at: hello@aliveandkicking.com.au

 

When faced with the prospect of having a difficult conversation, emotions run high and we look for reasons why it is such a challenging situation. 

We get frustrated, even angry, that we have to confront someone about their behaviour or the fact that they are doing something against the rules, or not following established procedures.  Why don’t they just do what they are supposed to do??

Then we seek to answer our own question – they are not doing the ‘right thing’ because

• They are thick
• They are rebellious
• They want to make things difficult
• They are unhappy
• (…insert your own language here….)

No wonder people want to avoid dealing with it – the other person really should know better!!

People regularly ask us how they can deal with difficult situations, and often times they really want to know how to catch the other person out so that the problem disappears or ‘someone else’ deals with it, anyone but you!

Don’t get me wrong here, I am not saying you are at fault (of course YOU know that, right?).  But you do have a role to play.

It is common for Fran and I to have someone describe a situation that is presenting as difficult, and to hear how much at fault the other person is.  We see how easily people get caught up in their own emotions and begin to view the situation through a narrow lens or filter.  This can have the effect of shining an unfavourable light on to ‘the other person.’ 

When we lay blame at the foot of another person, it complicates an already difficult situation.  And blaming limits our options to a successful resolution.

In a previous blog, I spoke about the costs to you, your organisation and others in the workplace is we avoid having a conversation about a difficult situation.

I also spoke about our 7 Steps to having Difficult Conversations:

            Step 1 – Decide to have the conversation

            Step 2 – Consider Root Causes

I now want to provide you with some practical tips to plan the conversation you have decided to have.  Again, I recommend using the worksheet of the Alive & Kicking 7 Steps to having Difficult Conversations to take notes as you watch this week’s video.

            Step 3 – Gather Details & Plan Logistics

            Step 4 – Decide What ‘Hat’ You Will Wear

            Step 5 – Plan the Conversation Flow / Process

This is in preparation for having the actual conversation.

Next I will address Steps 6 & 7

Step 6 – Have the Conversation

Step 7 – Review the Conversation

At this point, you have decided to have the conversation and have considered what possible causes there are to the situation.  Well done!

Step 3 – Gather Details & Plan Logistics

The next step to take is to gather relevant information and plan logistics. 

Who needs to be involved in this conversation?  It is highly recommended to check with your HR or Talent Management Team and ensure you are adhering to workplace policies and any statutory requirements.  Make a list of those people you feel need to be involved and have a discussion with them what role each one will play.  Remember to apply confidentiality and discretion where appropriate.

Anyone not on this list, by the way, should not be included in any discussions, formal or informal.  This will help to manage the situation effectively and will ensure you are acting professionally.

You also want to consider the best location and timing for this conversation.  Will you surprise the other person with an invitation to ‘step in to this office’?  Or will you consider what environment will be neutral and conducive for having an authentic conversation geared towards a positive outcome for all?

We simply love Stephen R Covey’s 7 Habits and recommend that you practice them in your planning and preparation. 

Begin with the end in mind – what do you want to have happen as a result of this conversation?  How do you want to feel?  How do you want the other person to feel?

Write this down – you will be surprised at the difference it makes to your approach.

Expect ‘human-ness’ to show up – yours and anyone else’s who will be involved.  Humans are emotional beings, whose ability to be rational and logical can be clouded by emotions running amok.

Consider what emotional reactions are likely – from you and others – and plan how to manage your emotions and support others to do the same.

Step 4 – Decide What ‘Hat’ You Will Wear

It is worth considering what ‘hat’ you will wear.  What do I mean by that?  In your role, you wear many ‘hats’ – the hat of a friend to some co-workers, the hat of a planner and scheduler (if you are in a manager’s role, you are scheduling others and planning for completion of work tasks), if you interact with customers, you wear a ‘customer service rep’ hat.

Make a list of all the different aspects of your work, and what ‘hat’ you need to wear for each.

Now think about what ‘hat’ you need to wear to have this conversation.  And how you will ensure the other person is clear what hat you are wearing.  If we are not sure of what hat we are wearing, it will be confusing to those we interact with.  And we are likely to confound the matter by playing different roles.

Next, it is time to clarify what the issue is all about.   I mentioned earlier that our experience is that most of the difficult conversations people face relate to behaviour;  this can be related to a performance matter, it could be some form of disobedience, or it could even relate to a cultural issue. 

Gaining clarity with what you are dealing will go a great distance in achieving a successful outcome.

By now you are establishing a context, and you are probably able to see that the ‘other person’ has other qualities and characteristic outside of this context. 

Step 5 – Plan the Conversation Flow / Process

You are also seeing that an effective strategy involves some brain power!

Describe how you will build and maintain rapport with those involved in the conversation – how can you start the conversation so that people are comfortable and not feeling trapped?  How will you maintain rapport?  If one or more of you are defensive, emotions will further distort perceptions and reduce the chances of reaching an amicable resolution.

Get creative in your thinking with this one – don’t limit yourself with your filters or negative thoughts about the other person.

You need to make sure you have evidence – or something that supports your conversation.   You want to be assured that what you are bringing to this conversation will help you adequately describe what is happening or what needs to change.  The more neutral that supporting evidence is, the more likely the other person will be able to accept it.

Points to consider when gathering and presenting support for your conversation include: what can be shared or disclosed? Is what you are presenting fact, or opinion, or both?

With Step 5,  there are a few factors to consider.

Even by sitting down and taking Steps 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 you are well and truly on the path to creating a practical plan. 

If you can spend 10-15 minutes on Steps 3, 4 & 5 you will notice how much more confidence you have about your ability to have a challenging conversation.  I hope you recognise you really do play an important role in the conversation!

Good luck!

Next, I will share with you the final steps to having difficult conversations with confidence and success…..

The information contained in this blog is sourced from our SAYING THE UNSAYABLE one day training course.

Difficult conversations are sometimes a necessary part of interacting with people, whether that is in the work environment or outside of it. 

They are difficult because no one finds them pleasant, or enjoyable, and they raise a swag of negative emotions for all involved.  People avoid talking to those whose behaviour creates problems. We talk about them and not to them. We avoid having difficult conversations.

If we do try to talk directly with the person whose behaviour is of concern – often the conversation misses the mark and creates additional problems with the work relationship. 

This is a topic that we get asked about constantly – in our coaching work, in our consultation, and in the communication workshops we deliver.  In our experience, it usually boils down to the behaviour of one or more individuals.  This behaviour causes disruption and some pretty negative emotions.

People make the mistake of avoiding what is scary or challenging, choosing instead to ‘lay low’ or seek comfort from others who are just as uncomfortable and disagree with the behaviour that is causing the difficulty.

Consider what can happen if avoidance is the chosen course of action:

1. People stay stuck
2. Frustration remains
3. Complaints increase
4. Einstein’s definition of insanity* applies
5. Trust remains low or drops further
6. Negative morale appears or increases
7. Productivity drops
8. Sick leave can increase
9. Claims of bullying or harassment can arise
10. Job satisfaction decreases
11. Personal health suffers
12. Mental health suffers
13. Factions or cliques develop
14. And most of all – the problem will CONTINUE. 

* when we do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result.

Because disagreement and conflict are part of human interaction we cannot avoid all that is  unpleasant.  We must learn how to successfully navigate these types of situations when they arise.

So what can you do?

You need a planned approach – the more difficult the conversation, the more detail your plan needs to include.  You must approach the conversation with care, consideration and the right mind frame.

This is not an easy, quick fix, nor is it complicated.  It requires some creative thinking on your part.  Can you set your current strategy aside?

There are 7 steps we recommend as part of our ‘Saying the Unsayable’ Workshop.  Let’s look at the first two steps to having a difficult conversation. 

If you want to get the most out of our tips, download the worksheet 7 steps to challenging conversations to take notes and jot down some of your own examples.

Step 1 – Decide to have the conversation

• Determine why this is important to you, and why it is important to the other person.
• Consider the impact of having this conversation, as well as
• The impact of not having this conversation?

If you have been avoiding the conversation, get really clear that you have made a choice – the choice to do nothing and to hope that someone else will deal with it, or wish that it would just go away.

In these types of situations, we are always at choice – be aware that even if you don’t consider yourself to be making a choice, not choosing IS a choice.

If you are not going to have the conversation, stop talking about the topic.  Move on.  Let it go. Avoid speaking about the behaviour giving rise to the difficulty.

If you cannot do that, then return to step one….

Step 2 – Consider Root Causes

What is causing the situation to occur, in your opinion?  If the name and face of a particular person just sprang to mind, acknowledge the quick response you had.  And gather additional information.  Is there some element present in the workplace that affects the situation?

A couple of points to check here – ensure you are standing on ‘solid ground’, and not on your ‘soap box’ of personal values, opinion, or morals.  There needs to be a solid foundation on which the conversation is based – be that organisational values, agreed terms of workplace behaviour, established family agreements, or even job descriptions. 

If there are not documented ‘ground rules’, guidelines or established standards (and this is what is the source of your frustration!) perhaps that is the basis of the conversation – to find common areas of agreement, how we will work or live together. 

Write down and consider all that you are thinking of the situation (as well as what you think of the other person).

There is no denying there is a problem and that it is causing difficulty for you (and possibly others).  We recommend that you take in as much information as you can, including your thoughts, feelings and opinions, as well as those of others in the workplace. 

Consider the facts from a neutral perspective.  How would someone who is not part of your work team view the situation? The other person? You?

Once you have decided to have the conversation and now have a good amount of information as to the root causes, it is time to take Step 3 – Gather Details & Plan Logistics.

Download the worksheet and spend ten minutes on Steps 1 & 2.  This is a way for you to build your skills as well as your confidence to tackling those challenging conversations.

The information contained in this blog is sourced from our SAYING THE UNSAYABLE one day training course.

Following on from last weeks post 4 signs of Positive Workplace Culture,  here are 4 MORE signs to look for:

1.  Leadership success is open, discussed and actively planned for 

Leaders are not fearful of others succeeding.  In fact, they encourage it.  They know that a part of their role is to see others exceed their own capabilities and their own position.  They know that when another person excels beyond them, they are truly leading.   Fear is not present in this situation.
What you can DO.
 
The first thing you can do is to read about top leaders and the habits they have.  One of them is to work on the skills and knowledge of their subordinates and to plan for their own succession.  They trust that new opportunities will open up for them and they help other leaders to succeed.  They groom people to take over their role as quickly as possible.   This gets seen and acknowledged.   Leaders who practice this principle always excel, grow and move up the ranks.   Leaders who hold on tightly to their position and their knowledge get left behind and they get stuck.

Step 1 – create a skills and knowledge matrix for your own role.
Step 2 – share that information with others who are interested in moving into your role.
Step 3 – create a plan for how you will help these people.
Step 4 – Make a plan for YOUR next role – and get active with this plan.

 
2. Position and Level is inconsequential to productivity.  People communicate and influence Up Down and Sideways!

If your environment is classically hierarchical – then chances are good that your culture will not be as positive as it can be.  When status of position becomes more important and more in focus than productivity, then people will sense this.

What you can DO:

Bring this out into the open and discuss the pros and cons of having a hierarchy.  Discuss the reasons why influencing in all directions is a healthy and positive way of behaving in a modern and contemporary organisation.

Take the lead in encouraging your own subordinates to bring proposals to your attention.  Help them learn to create a solid business case for things they believe will improve the business.

Bring these case studies to your own peers and your up-line managers.  Ask them if they are willing to do the same.

 

3. People have Courageous Conversations

When I hear people say things like:  “Oh – the CEO was in the elevator with me today and I was terrified to look at her!”   Or, “We can’t do that – the Union will get involved and they won’t even understand that we really are acting in the best interests of the people.”   

These are two types of conversations that indicate fear is present.

Things you can DO

1. Be proactive in having conversations.    If you have a union in or around your organisation – go meet with them regularly.  Find out what’s important to them.  Share with them the things you are doing to make this a great place for the people.  Get to know them well – and they will be more likely to listen and be on your side.

2.  Work toward an open door policy.  If you are a leader – speak with everyone often.  If you have leaders above you – encourage them to come and speak with you and your subordinates regularly.  Invite them to team meetings, invite them to share what’s happening in their world and what concerns them.

3.  Investigate how you and others respond to mistakes.   People often have a fear that any mistake will be dealt with harshly.   Create case studies that examine mistakes and explore ways to learn from them.   Make this public – not publicly embarrassing people who have made mistakes – but create ways to show that you do not CANE people who make mistakes, you help them to learn from them.

 

4. SIGN – Change Is Welcomed and Spoken About Regularly and Positively

There are two sides to the CHANGE COIN.

People are generally upset when change is thrust upon them – especially if the change must happen rapidly or completely without warning – as in, it’s already happened, like it or lump it!

On the other hand – people are generally happy with change they choose themselves.

In our current environment, change is normal, change is constant, change is rapid, change is expected, change readiness and flexibility and resilience are regarded in high esteem.

This must be programmed into the culture.

What you can DO:

1.     Speak about change often.

2.     Add the issue of CHANGE to your agenda at meetings and team gatherings.  If you do Scrums or huddles – then make change a commonly used term and add it to the content of your meetings.

3.     Engage in Resilience Training.  Get everyone used to the idea that change is good.  Change is always a part of who we are, what we do, and how we do things around here.   Make it known that we hire for people who enjoy and embrace change.   Help them to understand that change is a part of our organisational DNA.  It’s how we roll!

4.     Find and employ strategies that are linked to change.   These include

a.     Communication about change and what is needed.

b.     Models for change

c.     Decision making strategies for times of change

d.     Ways and means of engaging people in change

e.     Times and ways to celebrate successful change processes

f.       Discussions about what has changed, when it changed, how often it changed, how well it changed and what could be done better for the next round of change.

 

 

1. Turnover Is Low

Depending on the nature of the job, turnover is often a great indicator of culture.  If the turnover is high – then we would hope that the job role that we are looking at, or the nature of the work would be considered an entry-level job, or a stepping stone to another role.  This would be considered natural and even good attrition ~ as people are progressing through the steps well.

On the other hand, if the department does not consist of entry level or stepping stone types of roles, then this is a strong indicator that the culture of the environment is not a positive one.

I have a great example of this – and I’m actually going to name names here because I think they deserve the accolade for doing things right!   This is the Royal Automobile Club of Western Australia, in their Roadside Assistance Team.  To get into this team, someone really has retire to open up a position.  People love the work and the environment.   I know this because of past experience with the individuals in the team.  I recently had a breakdown – and a RACWA team member came to my rescue.  We got into this discussion and the person shared with me how much the job meant and that the team is still the same in regard to culture.

Here are some things you can DO.

1. DO A CULTURE SURVEY.   Do the survey with people inside and also outside of the environment.   Ask what they think of the culture – what is positive about it     and what is negative.  Please do make sure that you include open frame questions and not just rating scales.  You won’t get much useful information about HOW or WHAT to change with rating scales.
2. ASK PEOPLE ABOUT THEIR LONG TERM ASPIRATIONS.   Do they see themselves having a career here?  Doing this role?   Where do they want to be in 5 years?  10 years?
3. DO EXIT INTERVIEWS!  This is critical.  When a person leaves, we want to clearly understand whether we are experiencing “good” attrition or “bad” attrition.   Good attrition could include:

• When people are “head hunted” away to a higher position that we cannot offer.
• When a person has a life change (partner getting moved to another country) and they choose to follow that path.
• When a person has learned all they can learn here – and wants to seek something that we cannot offer.

1. DO SOME RESEARCH and find out about the average tenure for people in this type of job role or occupation – and then work out what is needed to beat the average!   Let you team know that this is happening – and ask for their input!  Especially if you have people who have already been in the position for more than the average tenure.  Ask them – DIRECTLY – what makes you stay here?

 

2. You are seen as “an Employer of Choice”

A great sign that you have a positive culture is when people come to you (or to your department, or even to HR) in an unsolicited way.  They specifically request to be interviewed and they leave their CV or Resume with the company, should another role become vacant.   They say things like:  I’ve heard such great things about working for this department – or even this particular person.  I want to be a part of this team!

Here are some things you can DO to become an Employer of Choice.

1. Ask your current team members what would have to happen in order for them to invite their friends and relatives to join this team?  What would make the culture and working experience so good that they would love to share this with the people who are really important in their lives?
2. Go to other working environments and ask them about what makes a culture a good one – and what would make them want to leave?  What would make them want to stay?  NOTE:  I think you will be surprised to find that money is rarely the main motivator!
3. Run a Culture Workshop with your team.   During this workshop, ask for the team’s input about what could be done to make this specific environment different in a positive way?   What could we do to have FUN every day?  What could we do that would have people excited about coming to work?  What things could we do to make a difference for people here / now?
4. Use an iWAM profile for all people and all roles.   This particular recommendation is unique in that I am recommending a specific profiling device.  This device is the iWAM.  It stands for Inventory of Workplace Attitudes and Motivations.   The device is exceptionally specific to details about working environments.  It is very flexible and can be used in so many ways.  Most interesting about this profile is that it can be used as a modeling device.  You can model a person or a role – and then recruit to match what has been modeled!

If you want more information about the iWAM profile and how it can be used, please contact me directly.  I will also give you a download as part of this session so you can read more about the profile.

3. People Feel Good and they naturally SMILE when they walk into your space

Culture is Palpable – it can be felt, seen, touched. When I walk into an environment, I can often “FEEL” the vibe of the place.  Culture is palpable!  I specifically look for expressions on faces, body posture of people in the environment, signs on the walls, and general sense of energy in the place.  Culture can absolutely be seen, heard and felt.  There are so many signs – if one is only open to looking for them.   The challenges is that we are often blinded by what we are a regular part of.  It’s time to get the blinders off – and sometimes we need some outside input for this!

Here are some things you can DO.

1. SMILE A LOT!  Speak with your team about smiling.  Encourage smiling many times during the day.  Give your team members some interesting information about the chemical processes that happen when a person smiles!

   Psychology today has a great blog that speaks about the neurotransmitters that are released by the brain every time we smile.

   Here’s another link to an article about mirror neurons.  Mirror Neurons take input from outside sources and reflect that input internally.  This is why we have reactions to things we see and hear.  If you see a person accidentally stub their toe, you may flinch in response.  This is your mirror neurons in action.   This is cause of empathy for others.

   A Smile will very likely cause others to smile in return.  The opposite is also true.  If we are frowning or showing a look of worry or consternation – that will likely be reflected in others as well.

2. CHOOSE YOUR ENERGY LEVEL!   If you want for others to have “high energy” – then choose that energy level yourself.  Walk a bit quicker.   Speak a bit more quickly than usual (unless you are already a very fast speaker – then don’t).  Show your excitement and invigoration for things.   Get a bit more animated that you might normally do.   Again, the mirror neurons will respond in others.
3. PRAISE PUBLICLY!   Give lots of regular praise.  Do so in a place where others hear this happening.  Give THANKS for things people do regularly.  If a person cleans something up – verbalise your thanks – even if this is a part of his/her job!  Verbalise the positive things regularly and encourage others to do so as well.  This can alo be translated into verbally remembering special occasions.  Announce people’s birthdays (if people are happy for this to happen).  Announce people’s work anniversaries, announce special accomplishments – EXAMPLE: If a person has just completed a learning module and is on the path for a higher level of learning or growth!

 

4. People do not engage in Gossip or Rumour Mongering

Time to Obliterate Gossip – Through Widescale Implementation of the Socratic Rule of 3.
A lot of environments have a negative and tarnished culture because of rampant gossip and rumour mongering.  My suggestion is to be a staunch ambassador for the Socratic Rule of 3 Test before saying things:   Here is a story to share with you to illustrate this.

One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance who ran up to him excitedly and said, “Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students?”

“Wait a moment,” Socrates replied. “Before you tell me I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Test of Three.”

“Test of Three?”

“That’s right,” Socrates continued. “Before you talk to me about my student let’s take a moment to test what you’re going to say. The first test is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?”

“No”  the man said, “actually I just heard about It.”

“All right,” said Socrates. “So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now let’s try the second test, the test of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?”

“No, on the contrary…”

“So” Socrates continued, “you want to tell me something bad about him even though you’re not certain it’s true?”

The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.

Socrates continued. “You may still pass though, because there is a third test – the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?”

“No, not really.”

“Well” concluded Socrates, “if what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even Useful, why tell it to me at all?”